Monthly Archives: December 2004

Countdown to New Year’s Eve

Another weekend, another round of holiday parties…

Things of note from hosts and guests:

* Bring funky desserts like dessert burgers made with cookies and candy sushi made with rice krispies treats.

* Show your culture by making Puerto Rican eggnog.

* Bring along friends in town from other cities (show ’em how New Yorkers party)

* Take loads of group pictures in the host’s bed (fully clothed, of course)

* Make a mystery tropical punch (Smirnoff Vodka, cranberry juice, Sprite and tons of fresh fruit) The mystery is you wonder how you got so smashed.

* Enjoy yourself as this is the most wonderful time of the year!

* Get plenty of rest so you’re ready for the New Year’s Eve bash next week.

When Event Attendance Is Low

Did you ever throw a party, but the crowd never comes??? Don’t despair! The small group who shows up still craves a good time. As the host, you should appreciate the opportunity to have a spontaneous intimate gathering instead of a huge party. Conversations get deeper and introductions are easier with a small group. Be the gracious host and thank everyone for coming, especially during this time of the year where people are often double-booked.

Brini Maxwell

The lovely Brini Maxwell is having a holiday show at Fez (380 Lafayette St) next Monday, December 20th.

From Flavorpill:

With Martha Stewart unavailable to dispense social etiquette advice this holiday season, what’s a dilettante reveler to do? Fear not! Brini Maxwell sashays to the rescue, bearing helpful hints and making sure you don’t embarrass yourself under the mistletoe. Dubbed the “Martha Stewart of Drag” back when that was considered a compliment, Ms. Maxwell hosts her own Style Network show, disseminating kitsch to America, one tasteless home at a time.

Double-Booked = Twice The Fun

During the holidaze, you may be invited to more than one event on the same night. Try to coordinate so that you can attend both. This is good for many reasons:

1.Keeps both hosts happy!

2.Meet two different sets of people

3.Be the center of attention twice in one night

4.Show how popular you are by leaving one party early and arriving at the other late

5.No one will know how much you ate, drank or flirted at each party (unless you blog about it)

Tips For The Tipsy

Man-about-town Manhattan Transfer (now ClusterStock’s John Carney) has provided a classic guide on how to survive holiday parties.

Here’s one of his gems of wisdom:

Scenario 1: You can’t remember the name of the co-worker you are making out with in the supply cabinet.

Try to keep her mouth occupied in ways other than talking. If necessary, call her “baby” and “beautiful.” In my experience you should never resort to “mami” unless you are of the Latin persuasion. The fact is she probably doesn’t remember your name either. Unless you are her boss. Then you’re fucked.

Netiquette or Social Graces for Techies

The Social Graces are not a myth. Despite the rude behavior of many, there are some rules, and the graceful Sloane Crosley gives us New Yorkers the skinny on “technetiquette“. [Published in 2004, this Village Voice article is still relevant. I added my notes in the brackets.]

1) Ideally, don’t use Evite. Send out a mass bcc’ed e-mail or pdf or invites on dead trees. If you somehow feel inexplicably drawn to the Evite, drop the irony act and make it as basic and functional as possible.

2) Forwards. Sloane proposes we use mass forwards for emergencies only. [With the current 2008 economic crisis, sent forwards if you may homeless, jobless or hungry. Your friends will help.]

3.Texting. Keep it simple, skip the conjunctions and the run-on sentences and remember that texting is more closely related to phoning than e-mailing.

4)Camera Phone. “It’s just a picture. Why not?” [Well, I think you should get picture approval if the pictures are going online anywhere. Or you can just stay at home.]

Update: Sloane is now author of collection of essays, I Was Told There’d Be Cake.

The Best Guest

Here are a few tips that I have garnered from parties of late:

·When bringing a bottle of wine to a house party, look for wine with a funny name like Fat Bastard or Woop Woop. Your hosts will remember you!

·Be sure to greet the host and other guests before making a mad dash to the bar area.

·Play a fun game like Taboo at the party, but don’t get too hung up on winning. People tend to get competitive. Apples To Apples and Boggle are also fun games.

·Don’t reciprocate when a drunk-but-cute guest flirts with you in front of his girlfriend. (He will need assistance getting home, so let the girlfriend handle the bastard.)

·Offer to prepare a dish, but make sure it’s delish!

·Thanks your hosts and think of inviting them to your next bash if you have an apartment that fits more than you and your roommate.